Researchers believe that children should be made to feel competent, not confident. Montessori believes that if you can make your child feel competent, his confidence will automatically soar. Here are some ways you can help.
Compliment wisely
Kids definitely need plenty of encouragement, whether they are learning to walk, read or get dressed by himself. However, consider this; if your child gets so used to hearing ‘Good job!’ every time he does something, he may have a hard time differentiating when his achievements are really worth celebrating. There might come a time when your compliments may be ignored. Our day care teachers believe that children should not be complimented for things they are supposed to do. A simple ‘thank you’ is enough then; or instead of saying that your child’s painting is the best you have ever seen, say that you loved the way he has incorporated the colors.
Glass half full
Help your child see the better side of things when he faces a disappointment. Instead of only offering a reassurance of looking at the bright side of things, our preschoolers are encouraged to think about how a situation can be made better and how they can reach their goals. If he has not been picked a s a lead star in a school play, don’t just say ‘But I think you are a star.” Instead sit him down and explain that you understand the disappointment and come up with ways to make it better next time together.
Problem Solving
When children are able to negotiate to get what they want, kids feel super confident. The key to this is sometimes to bite your tongue when your child comes to you with a problem or complaint at school or the playground. As your child what a good solution would be to the problem and you will be surprised to see how children as young as four can come up with solutions if only they are allowed to think.
Parenting is an infinite world of how’s and why’s and I don’t know’s…….try these simple strategies to see how they can help you. Happy Parenting!
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