Author: fuelingbrains_AdMEEn

There are so many parenting techniques out there today; parents are often confused as to what to apply. As much as you should use your personal family values as a guide, there are some fundamental principles that are important to follow. Here are three ways you can parent successfully so your children will learn.

The most important thing you should always bear in mind is never to discuss problems with your child’s personality with someone else, knowing your child may overhear the conversation. If they hear you discuss how mean or shy or jealous they are with someone, they will not only start resenting you for it, they may also feel that they cannot control these problems in their personalities. Effective parenting says to discuss personality problems with your child and you may get a more positive outcome. Set goals together and work towards achieving them. Children who are of preschool age too can understand what you are saying, so go ahead and work together!

When we praise our preschool children or even older children, it shows them that they are following your values and expectations. When children don’t receive praise, they will feel that they are not believed in. How you dish out praise is one very important thing. Giving out words like perfect, the best, most beautiful – superlatives – can set impossible expectation for the child. How can they get better than this? Instead, go for reasonable praise – hardworking, smart, kind – which give out the message that the expectations are also reasonable.

Another crucial aspect of smart parenting is not to have parents that are always in conflict. You will easily confuse children, young or old if you and your partner lead in two opposite directions. Do you show respect to your partner? Do you discuss things calmly with your partner? Then, this is what your child will learn. You cannot expect your child to respect your partner if you don’t.  Parents and grandparents should always be united when it comes to parenting.

Now that you have a few important tips on good parenting, let us have some of your ideas!

We are in the habit of sending our preschool kids off to school every morning with loads of love and good wishes for a lovely day ahead. Sometimes, lots of ‘have you taken your snack bag?’, ‘where is your jacket?’ and other such lines get in the way. Here are some effective suggestions for you to ensure you send loads of love your child’s way when she goes off to preschool every morning.

Set your alarm ten minutes early. Five minutes for you to enjoy the quiet and bliss of the morning before anyone is up. Another five minutes for you to spend with your pajama clad babies snuggling. This quiet connecting time makes a world of a difference before the stampede of the day begins – you will notice it will not be a stampede anymore. Before the mundane chores of getting showered, dressed and having breakfast begins, enjoy this snuggle time when everyone in the home knows how much they are loved. Warm and loving words bring about smiles on everyone’s faces.

This special time can go on till your child leaves for preschool. Talk to her about her dreams and yours while she is in the shower. Make after school plans at the breakfast table. Ask your babies for suggestions about lunch after school. All this conversation starts up the day well.

How do you feel when you are late for work and end up rushing through the morning before you leave? Imagine then how your child would feel if she is rushed through the morning, every morning? Since you are getting into the habit of waking up earlier than usual daily, you may also have leftover time before the kids need to leave for preschool. Spend these few minutes telling your child how much you love her and encourage her to think happy thoughts for a happy day ahead.

Regular use of this special time every morning promises non-whiny, non-teary mornings for both you and your children!

Happy Parenting!

The one thing your mum was never wrong about is that the most important meal of the day is breakfast. Whatever your age, breakfast is the king of meals. Now try explaining that to a toddler, especially one who is a fussy eater. But there is good reason to coax your preschool child into having a few morsels of breakfast. Eating a healthy breakfast is linked to better moods, improved metabolic rates, lower obesity rates and longer attention spans which translate into better performance at daycare. All this also forms a good habit and routine for your child as he grows up. A good breakfast should have a good mix of protein, fiber, calcium, some sugar and a teeny bit of healthy fat. Here are some winning breakfast recipes that have scored full points with preschool children.

Rainbow parfait – all you need to do is alternate layers of yoghurt and your child’s favourite fruit all chopped up. You can use plain or flavoured yoghurt, depending on your child’s preference. Top this with a granola bar or some whole grain unsweetened cereal. The lovely colours will be tempting enough for any child. When purchasing your yoghurt, check out the sugar content. Better still, make your own yoghurt!

Eggs – A classic breakfast for any age, eggs give you the best nourishment you need at this hour. Try this recipe – egg in the window. Use a cookie cutter to make a hole in a slice of bread. Spread both sides of the bread with real butter (not margarine). Break an egg into the cutout center and cook both sides till the egg is cooked and the bread is browned. Toast the little cutout bread and serve it on the side. There, a perfect breakfast for your perfect preschool toddler.

Breakfast in a cup – For the mornings when you may be in a rush, instant breakfast drinks that you can mix with milk are easy and nutritious. Your child will get a good dose of protein, calcium and fiber. Get your child used to the taste of oatmeal, as this is one excellent breakfast to start the day with. Easy to prepare, it also helps your child to form the habit of healthy breakfasts.

Happy Parenting!

Unconditional love is not only what we feel towards our children. It is what they should feel coming from us too – love with no strings attached. Which means that your child does not need to do anything to earn your love; you love her simply for who she is. This is not entirely easy, as most of us, parents and educators alike want many things ‘fixed’ in our children.

So what can you do to love your child unconditionally? Here are a few basics……

Teach yourself to appreciate your child’s weaknesses. Understand that everyone has traits in them that take a special strength to bear and manage. Take for example a very stubborn pre-school child, one that you can only get through with maximum effort. Instead of focusing on the negative part of this trait, think about how this type of personality will do well in the field of law or if she becomes a detective. This persistence will get her along way! Explain to your child that although this part of her personality may be an asset, it can drive people up the wall. She needs to control it, rather than allowing it to control her.

More often than now, try to look at things form your child’s point of view. We almost always think we are right, but sometimes, another way could be a way closer to reality. Try to look at the reason why your child is misbehaving, not the fact that she is misbehaving in the first place. Addressing the problem may make things easier for everyone.

Empathize with your child when she misbehaves, instead of having a corner time or a yelling session. Sometimes, when we empathize with our little ones, we are inviting them to trust us with their deeper feelings. If for example, your child has yelled and hit his sibling, don’t send him up to his room. Tell him that you don’t do things like that in this home and ask him what the matter is. You will be surprised by what he can tell you!

Embrace. Accept. Love

Patience is something that you are not born with but something that you practice to be perfect at. Whether you child is of pre-school age or in university, every parent will at some time or other lose his or her patience and get frustrated or angry. If patience is practiced, it can develop over time just as we develop a habit. Read on for some great tips to be a much more patient parent.

Count to Ten

As childish as it sounds, this method really does help. The moment you feel your anger starting to boil or frustration starting to set in, stop and count to 10 slowly (you can do this in your mind). You will notice that most of the initial anger you felt would have subsided by now and a more logical you would have emerged. Sometimes, you may want to count to 10 loudly, giving your children a signal to stop and run J

As you count to 10, take deep breaths. With every breath, you will feel the frustration leave you.

Time-out                   

One of the most effective things you can do not to react angrily in a situation is to walk away – for a few minutes. It’s often a good idea to take a break from the situation, calm yourself down, give your child a chance to calm down, plan out what you are going to say and then return. The planning what to say part is very important because often we end up saying things that may be a bit too harsh when we are angry. Another advantage of being the calm one is to prevent your pre school child from getting under your skin.

Teach

One thing that has helped me a lot when I almost lose it is to remember that kids are just that; kids. If they were adults they would probably react to situations differently. If you always remember that they are still learning things and are not perfect, you will automatically become a much calmer person because your job is to teach correct behavior, not get angry to it. If you keep telling yourself that you are the teacher and you have to be patient, you will be. Try not to expect miracles overnight. Even we adults sometimes take more than a try to get something right.

Visualize

This is something I can swear by. Something you should do before or after a frustrating situation comes up is to regularly practice visualization. Visualize how you want to react when your child does something that gets you mad. Go into great detail as to how you will react, what you will say, how you will look and how your child will respond. Slowly but surely, all that you have visualized will come true.

Chill and Love

Sometimes, you need to just take a step back and be happy with all the family you have around you and just have a good laugh. Life is too short….so just smile and treat all your children with the number one medicine that has never failed – love and more love. When you want to react to anger, just love instead. Want to react to frustration – just love instead. When you give out all that love, it is bound to come back to you.

Happy Parenting!

How often have you seen your child hide behind you or run away when you introduce him to guests? Pre-school children are often shy when confronted with people they don’t know. How can you help him overcome his shyness and be well-mannered around adults?

Many children are naturally shy and our psychologists at the day care always insist that we should not pressure shy children to respond to people if it can cause them anxiety. What you can do to help your child out is be a part of the conversation. If someone for example, comments on your child’s pretty dress, you could chime in by saying ‘Thank you, we had picked this up on our last shopping trip’ and then turn to your child and ask her to remind you where it was bought. This indirect inclusion in a conversation often helps shy children because they are addressing you and not the stranger.

If you are going to attend a party with many people, some who your child knows and others whom she may not, it is a good idea to prepare her in advance. Sit her down and tell her exactly where you are going and who she is going to meet over there. Include names of people she knows and people she does not. Tell her the kind of questions she may be asked and practice answering them. Surprisingly, this technique works very well with young children simply because they know what to expect. Throwing something unexpected at them gets their anxiety levels up.

Whatever you do, never ever label your child as ‘shy’ in front of others. These labels will only make her even more shy and even more anxious and even more embarrassed. You want to boost her self-esteem, not destroy it. Come up with ways on how you can make her more comfortable. These things get better with time and age. As children start going to school and make more friends, shyness slowly starts to disappear too.

Happy Parenting!

Your best friend and your worst enemy is often your sibling. It’s absolutely normal for siblings to fight and there are enough reasons for them to. Temperament, jealousy, a need to be better, and many other reasons; forgotten by adults. An important role for parents is to manage these conflicts between siblings.

Pre school children are very prone to sibling rivalry. They are old enough to show their frustration but too young to take charge of their emotions. What makes things worse is their lack of understanding because of their young age. They don’t know how to handle people with different temperaments. If a child clings on to a parent for some reason, the other may get jealous, leading to rivalry again. Parents are their best examples; if parents resolve conflicts through arguments, children learn the same thing.

Sibling rivalry can be a small thing or can be big enough to take over the energies of the entire household. A one big tip for parents: don’t get involved and try to solve their little squabbles unless they are in danger of harming one another or themselves. Remember the time when you were kids yourselves; did you like it when your parents intervened every now and then?

If you have to intervene, go through the following list so you are well prepared and you take the best course of action:

Separate the children involved. In the heat of the moment, it is not possible to work things out well.

Try your best not to place blame on any child. Your job is to mediate. Once the children have calmed down, talk to them. Don’t focus on who was right and who was wrong. It takes two to clap. Always. Focus on looking for a solution. Tell each child what they did right and what they did wrong.

For pre school children, it is a bit hard to understand the meaning of delayed gratification. You cannot tell a three year old that she can play with a toy today and her sibling can play with it tomorrow. They simply will not understand it. Instead, make the time span shorter so they can look at the clock and know their time will come soon.

If your child can learn how to manage conflicts with her siblings well, she can manage conflicts with her friends too. These are tools children ill need for the rest of their lives!

Happy Parenting!

It has been seen that children who have attended a quality pre school end up doing better in school later. They also get better jobs and are also less likely to be involved in crimes and drugs because of the quality atmosphere offered at pre schools. Finding the right pre school for your child however, is no easy task with so many educational philosophies out there.

Calgary Pre Schools have all the right dosages of the key factors you need to look for in a pre school for your child. Find out the following important details from your prospective pre school so you know what you are getting.

Find out how play, both physical and imaginative are incorporated into daily curriculum. A good pre school gives plenty of opportunity for play to children. Pre School Calgary NW has a curriculum that has play that is connected to education too. As a child plays, he learns. Physical play helps develop a child’s gross motor skills, so look out for the play corner in the classroom and look at what is being offered. Also look at the outdoor play area and look at how big the running area is and whether there are tricycles and balls around for kids to play with.

Early reading is an important factor if you want your child to have a love for reading later in life. Calgary Pre Schools focus on ABCs and 123s early on in the child’s life as these help immensely later in life. Look for number and letter materials around the classroom and speak to the teachers about reading and Math activities.

Montessori truly believes in allowing the child to pick his own activity. While we may look for some controlled choosing, there should be ample opportunity for children to pick their own activities, at least for some time during the day. These activities should be based around Literacy, Science and numbers.

One thing that sets Calgary Pre Schools apart is the fact that the values set for children is very close to what is being practiced at home. This consistency helps in maintaining the development of the child. If these values differ, a child only becomes terribly confused. Talk to the teacher about the type of manners and discipline instilled and you will know if the pre school is right for you and your child.

The right pre school is where your child develops perfectly physically, emotionally and intellectually. Make a wise choice!

How often do we parents fret and fuss because we have to say no to our kids a million times a day? ‘Yes’ always is music to kids’ ears and but at times it is necessary to say no to your preschool child simply to bring in some discipline into the home. There are ways to make your ‘No’ seem less harsh; try these tips straight from child professionals and experienced mothers.

Train yourself not to give in to pleading, whining, tantrums and tears – the whole drama; just to keep peace. This will and can only lead to more of the same behavior and doing something about it much later will only add to your problems. Your child should never have the understanding that he has the power to influence you and wear you down with threats.

When you plan to say ‘no’, make it sound like conversational. You don’t need to be shrill and loud because nobody likes a tone like that. There are more chances of rebellion when your tone is shrill than when your tone is neutral. Having said that, your tone should however have the seriousness and weight to convey your authority.

Try some creativity when you want to say no. Instead of the quick snap of ‘no’, try flipping it into a ‘yes, but some other time’ or ’yes, you can have a candy; but right after dinner’. You can also put your no into options like ‘you can either play ball outside, or just roll it inside the house – your choice’.

Think about your ‘no’ before you actually say it. With preschool kids, we sometimes take for granted that their each request will be ridiculous and we need to say no every time. Empathize with your child when his feelings are hurt when you have to say no. If you are saying no for a playdate your child is dying to go to, tell him why you have to say no. Tell him you understand how badly he wants to go, but there is a reason why you can’t let him. In addition, tell him when he can go instead. This will not break his heart as badly.

Try to put in just as many ‘yes’ when you say ‘no’. A good balance is the key to successful parenting – whether your child is of a preschool age or older.